Not all dreams are meant to be, but that doesn’t stop the young artist from dreaming them.

John Patrick charts the course of a young, naive gay boy as he begins a journey into the world he thought he wanted. The lead track sets the stage as we contemplate the Immortal Dreams that are within all of us. A chance at fame, fleeting though it may be, a chance to be seen and heard the world over. With its heavy electric vibe, the pounding of the music like the pounding of your heart as you strive to achieve what you thought you wanted.

But everything comes with a price…

The young artist finds himself with the greatest offer he’s every known, a chance to be the things he dreams of, the star. But like a spider weaving a web, the man who offers this dream attaches strings, ones that the artist thinks are of his own making, but soon he is ensnared. Top of the World charts the haunting trek to the top as the artist rides his benefactor, both literally and figuratively to get what he’s always desired. Only in hindsight does the naive young artist come to understand that the offer of rewards is just another form of power and manipulation. The vacant, almost abandoned musical backing, the steady drip of the strings and thudding of the bass like the spider draining the artist of both vitality twisting the dream to suit the needs of others.

To be a star, you must become a product.

From the highs of being pulled into the spider’s web the young artists finds himself being pressed, pulled and homogenized into the perfect product. He can’t be gay, that would limit sales. He can’t be angsty, that would limit sales. He can’t speak his truth…that would limit sales. But this is what he said he wanted. Fame Factory begins like a circus shanty, the old machine beginning to churn up its gears, ready to print out another “pop” sensation. Then the base hits and you are ready for the show. You can feel the strain as the artist is pulled an prodded, poked and pushed until he becomes something that spreadsheets and accountants know will sell. But the factory is a show for us as well. What will the next single be? Doesn’t he look so hot? When can we buy more and more and more…but don’t you dare disappoint us!

You can live your whole career in the blink of an eye.

The crash of flashing lights and the constant craving of the public for content, videos, images, secrets and more. The Paparazzi begins with the solemn chanting of our holy religion, celebrity, before breaking into a soaring melody sweeping down, down, down, into the hits of the kick drum, the relentless heartbeat of a hungry monster. The young artist needs an image, you can’t sell music without an image. A fake romance, a fake drama, a fake life for the public to consume. He is forced to “date” another star who’s light has begun to fade. Together they can build each other up, only that’s not what we want to see. We want to see things fall down, we want to tear them down. We like to see things crash. And so the music builds to a feverish pitch as we watch with glee and anticipation, hopeful for the fall.

Everything looks perfect when you can edit out the bad parts.

Silver Screen finds our young artist at a breaking point. The picture perfect life with his boyfriend ruined by his avarice for the life he thought he wanted. His career always dependent upon the next big thing, on the lies that he has to tell in order to sell himself. As the music opens, so does the movie reel of his life. He can see the movie that was supposed to be his life floating up there on the screen as he is about to perform for a hungry audience singing songs he has no feelings about. And in that moment he sees his ex-boyfriend in the crowd. It’s like everything comes crashing down. He can’t play the part anymore. These lines are wrong. The electronic elements keep bouncing away as the truth of the words begin to hit home. “I left my soul on the silver screen…”

Everything that feels good is not always good

In perhaps the most upbeat songs on the EP, Secrets grooves its way in with a beat and a bounce. As the artist unravels so too does the sounds. We leave behind the electronic processing and get a much more raw sound from John just as the artist he is playing begins to get raw himself. From drug fueled sex to the revelation of just how many secrets he’s kept and have been kept from him. You can hear the rock that will define John’s original sound begin to develop as the track continues. The artist is pulled into a night of debauchery by his Ex, who uses the insobriety to expose the artist. He films the two having sex and releases it for the world to see. Everything is out.

With this shadow of a life…

The end has come. The artist has awoken to a flood of hate and disappointment as he begins to wander what this shadow of a life he has led is about. The dream is gone, the friends he thought he had, gone, there is nothing of his life left to him. Shadow is the first rock sound on the EP, the artist has emerged, though for John these are his final moments. John himself emerges from this tracks with the guttural honesty that defines his future projects. There is a hope in his words even though to John this is the end of the story, the final conclusion of death. Coming of the bridge it is a heart-breaking plea for someone, anyone to help him, to walk beside him, to help him find someone who needs him outside of his own shadow.

Something Like Summer

In 2017 Something Like Summer an already popular gay novel became a independent movie, from the producers of Judas Kiss. John was asked to include Shadow as one of the pivotal moments in the characters life. He also recorded an Adult Contemporary version of the song for the credits.